The Letter
by goldensilver
Summary: Hermione has a confession to make, who better to tell her secret to than three dead people she's not sure she'll ever see?


Hermione had finally figured it out.

How to send a letter, in a matter of speaking, to someone who was dead.

Or, in this case, to _people_ who were dead.

She was going to write to James, Sirius, and Lily, they were the only people she could turn to now, the only people to whom she could tell everything without having to look them in the eyes and see the disgust that she knew would be there.

It was there when Ginny had found out and made quite plain when she stopped speaking to them and it was there when Snape found out and even though she had eventually made him understand she still saw pity in his eyes when he looked at her and disgust when he looked at them.

So, now, after a year and a half of doing this, she needed unload and as she wasn't sure as to whether or not she would ever make it to Heaven to see Sirius, James, and Lily, she decided that they were perfect.

Which brought her out to a clearing in the Forbidden Forest in March of her seventh year, all of her duties performed and time to do something for herself.

Even though she knew that she needed what they did just as much as they did usually.

The spell was simple, write the letter on a special piece of parchment, one designed for this spell, drop the parchment into the potion and set the potion on fire.

So after she made the potion, she sat down and wrote.

Dear Sirius, Lily, and James

Having fun in Heaven? Knowing Sirius and James I'll bet you are. All of you are probably wondering as to why I'm writing to you guys, if I found this spell surely I would've given it to Harry, right? Well, the truth is that I need to tell someone everything and you three are the lucky winners, though you guys are really not going to like what you read.

In the August, between fifth and sixth year, I could already see the changes coming on fast, Harry was growing darker and more cold, Ron right along with him because while at first he wouldn't leave his best friend alone, at the beginning of August he, Harry, and Percy had all been cornered by Macnair and Avery and they had given Ron a choice, his brother or Harry. Now, the choice was easy for Ron, Percy too as we were told later, Harry would live because he had to and because Ron loved him more. Molly and Arthur haven't really been quite the same toward Ron and Harry ever since.

Though we all know that had Ron chosen Percy they would've reacted in the same way.

And something good did come out of the night, Avery was killed by an Avada Kedavra from Ron and, with a spell that none of us are still entirely sure of, Harry broke Macnair's back in seven different places and then turned him over to Moody. It was then that Harry and Ron started going out in the evenings to Muggle bars, they both looked eighteen by then so they never got caught. No one lived at Headquarters anymore but Ron, Harry, Remus, and myself, no one ever remained past sundown after Percy's death, though, truth be told, the Weasleys were the only ones to remain past sundown after Sirius's. So when Harry and Ron went out, there was no one to stop them, Remus did the same thing and the one time I tried Harry gave me a black eye and Ron pushed me into the hall table so hard I had a bruise line across my entire back. So then one night, about two weeks before we all went back to Hogwarts (Remus is a professor again) Remus came in completely drunk and I helped him up to his room. As I was laying him on the bed he just grabbed me and kissed me. I knew that he needed this, even though he'd probably already fucked some girl that night, all three of them always found some girl every time they went out. So I went along with it and lost my virginity during very rough sex with Remus. Though I came twice so I guess I needed it just as much. After Remus had collapsed against me I heard Harry say "What? We don't get a turn?" So I just got out of Remus' bed and followed Harry to his, and then it was Ron's turn. So it became routine, whichever one of them came home first got me first and then the other two could call their spots. Right before we went back to Hogwarts there was a full moon, and the night before he would start changing Remus grabbed me before sundown and I didn't get out of his room till two in the morning. Harry and Ron were waiting patiently in my room and they each had me on my bed. I couldn't walk the next day but I couldn't say no when Harry and Ron got home that night, or the night after that, or when Remus came the morning before the final night of his change. Luckily, Ron and Harry found some girls that peaked their interest that night and didn't blow through the door until nine am the next morning. When Dumbledore came to see us, the day before we left for Hogwarts, I asked him if maybe Remus could be moved to a larger living area, and Harry, Ron, and I could move in with him. Behind Dumbledore's back all three men stared at me, they'd always assumed that I hated our arrangement, hated that I usually slept in the bed of whoever had me last, hated that we never talked about what we did. They told me all of this after Dumbledore had gone. Dumbledore had given his permission, even said he thought, that with everything, it was probably a good idea. And, besides, he trusted us. Ha. The only thing that changed when we got to Hogwarts was that a lot of the time all three boys had me at once. One through the front, one in the back, and one in my mouth. It was one of these times, in early September, that Ginny and Snape walked in. Dumbledore wanted all four of us to be schooled in Occlumency so that's why they were there. They heard noises coming from Remus' room and figured we were in there doing homework. Ginny's sob was what alerted us to their presence, she ran and Snape walked out to the common room, I put on a robe and talked to him. Told him that it was something we did because it was something we all needed, even me. So Snape started supplying me with the potions I needed, so I wouldn't have to send out for them, it's well known that Madame Pomfrey likes to play amateur shrink/sleuth if one goes to her for them.

We've been doing this now for about a year and a half and sometimes I wonder if we'll ever stop. I doubt we will, all three guys have had at least one fairly serious relationship during this time and unless one of them is spending the night with someone I still fuck each one every night. But we talk now. About everything, about school and girlfriends and boyfriends and they still get protective in their 'this is the girl in our group, our friend/sister/mother/lover, and we will do anything to protect her' way. Totally scared off Terry Boot when he tried to date me. I locked my door with a bunch of spells and the actual lock that night and wouldn't come out until they promised they would apologize to Terry, they did and Terry and I dated for five months. Though when we did finally break up, very mutually, Remus took thirty points from Ravenclaw when Terry ran into class a second after the bell had rung. Boys stopped trying to date me after that. And as unhappy as I was at them, I didn't care as much as I should've because I still had them. And we all love each other more than anyone else in the world.

Now, you may be wondering why it is that my parents would just let me live with them, both at Hogwarts and during the summer, and here's your answer: right after Sirius died my parents were both murdered by Deatheaters and Remus was given full custody of me. You see after that whole debacle at the Ministry people were pissed but then the first Dark Mark hit the sky and the people were calling for Fudge's blood. He stepped down immediately and Arthur Weasley took his place. One of his first acts as Minister of Magic was to give full custody of me and Harry to Remus, though the summer between fifth and sixth years and the summer between sixth and seventh Harry had to spend a full twenty-four hours in the Dursley's company to keep the magic going.

Now for the happy stuff, in the middle of our sixth year Peter was found and Sirius pronounced innocent. When the public found out that Sirius was dead they called for a funereal, a great big one befitting 'one of the greatest hero's of our time', makes me worry about what they'll do when Harry dies. I am Head Girl this year and Harry and Ron are the seventh year prefects, first time in 500 years that two people of the same gender were prefects for the same year. I just want to let you guys know that we love you, very much, and Sirius we miss you more than anything world. Oh, and Sirius? THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

Love Always

Hermione

With that she was finished, so she put the pieces of parchment into an envelope made of the same material, addressed it, dropped it into the potion, and lit the potion on fire.

Sirius was the one that heard the knock on the door.

"Sir," Said one of the messenger angels, "This has come for you and Miss Lily and Mister James." The angel handed him the letter as Sirius stuttered a 'thank you.'

Sirius called down Lily and James and then looked at the letter,

'Sirius Orion Black

James Andrew Potter

Lily Marie Evans Potter'

Then he turned the letter over, expecting to see Dumbledore's name, He gasped when he saw 'Hermione Emma Granger'

"What is it Padfoot?" Asked James as he and Lily came down the stairs, "Hermione used the Naelo spell to send us a letter." "Oh God." "I'm sure it's nothing Lil. Well what are you waiting for Padfoot? Open it and read it to us."

So he did.


End file.
